Monday, January 12, 2009

TASTE: Carpathian witch's dumplings with grave soil

The old wench coughed up another page from the Ukrainian Cookbook of Necromancy, this one is for dumplings (vareniki)...

Requited love until death do you part is guaranteed:


Ingredients (serves 2):
1 tablespoon of dirt from the grave of a person with the same name as your intended lover
4 cups of wheat flour w/additional for rolling
1 cup of water
1 medium yellow onion (diced)
2 medium potatoes (starchy type, skinned)
1/2 cup of green onion (diced, including green shaft)
1 cup of sour cream
100 grams of cheddar cheese (grated)
50 grams of salo or bacon (cut into thin strips)
salt/black pepper/dill

Step one: Boil and mash the potato while frying the diced onion until it is caramelized and the bacon until it is very crispy.

Step two: Crumble the bacon and set it aside. Combine seasoning with the mashed potato, 1/2 of the fried onion, grated cheese and grave soil into an even mixture. Set aside the other half of the onion.

Step three: Make the dough. The flour in Ukraine is very particular. So here is an easy international recipe for vareniki dough.

Step four: Create the dumplings. Pick about 30 golf ball-sized bits of dough and roll them in a light layer of flower. Add 1 heaping table spoon of filling to the center of each . Now fold the dough in half and pinch together the edges. Traditional vareniki shaping is of a vagina or fetus in the womb. It is a fertility symbol, like a new moon.


Step five: Boil and garnish. Boil the dumplings for three minutes in salted water. Remove from the pot and rinse in cool water. Top with sour cream, bacon bits, green onion and the rest of the fried onion.

Now serve to your intended lover on a new moon and prepare for eternal devotion.

recipe from Drakoshka

TASTE: Carpathian witch's spicy holubtsi with menstrual blood

3 comments:

URBAN BLONDE said...

I've been making them wrong all these years! I never knew graveyard dirt was the secret ingredient.

fucoid said...

witch: just a spoonful dear

Sandra said...

Bwuahahaaaahaha,:0)superb